tentacruelest | 1st Wave

1st Wave

[Down in the depths of Zero sits a sulking, furious squid creature, wrapping his tentacle-like hand around his communicator. Davy Jones has been looking it over for the past day, and is thus far unimpressed. A way to talk to the rest of the crew? What was the point? They had nothing worthwhile to discuss]

Pardon the intrusion of an old pirate captain, but I believe I've requested to see his grace the Admiral, if he so deigns to get his fat arse off the bridge and address my concerns.

Bah - you think a day's stay in the brig will ease th' way of our voyage together? You think your pathetic lot of untested boys, women and slaves is enough to keep Davy Jones at bay for long? You're more of a fool than I'd taken you for.

And the next bilge rat what comes down here prattling on about inmates and other worlds is the next I mark for death.

Riddick - I name ye. Dean Winchester - I name ye too.

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[Iris smiles, very relaxed and cheerful, and raises the glass she's brought with her as if in a toast.]

'Ardly questioning, poppet, just kicking off the conversation. Iris Wildthyme, temporal adventuress, former secret agent, occasional darts champion, presently Warden. We were wondering if there's owt you can do about your puddle habit, sweetheart. Only some bugger's going to slip on that and break their neck one of these days, and that's never a nice start to anyone's day, is it?

[Sneering, Davy turns to look himself over. He's drying out already, not being so close to the Dutchman; Zero is not nearly as wet as the halls he's dragged himself through]

Because when I am press-ganged into service aboard another's ship, the last thing I'll be wanting to do is getting the place a bit wet.

I don't need to tell you 'ow a lot of people living in a small space need to watch their inconvenient little 'abits, I'm sure.

[So very friendly. So very mildly spoken.]

[Scowling through the bars at Iris, Jones makes a big show of his sarcasm]

You come here, t'imprison me, to keep me from my ship, and you lot have the audacity and th' gall to demand that I treat this heap of whale dung with respect?

No, see, now you're getting confused again there, my love. None of us brought you 'ere. Our job's to set you free again. The respect we'll ask of you is only what any living person might want off any other: little things like not 'aving their necks broken 'cause you woke up on the wrong side of bed, see?

[She eyes his tentacles and his brine trail.]

Or marine cavern or whatever you use for a bed, lovey.

[With a scoff, Davy drops down on the cot again, steaming in his shell]

Then by your leave; set me free, Woman.

Well, I could let you out of Zero, but as a matter of courtesy to the bloke that put you 'ere and to the one you killed, love, I'm not going to do that just yet. I don't feel like seeing any more of me friends killed and I'm not quite sure you've calmed down enough.

Getting you off this barge? That's a bit more of a longterm prospect. You're the only one that can do that. You'll 'ave one of us assigned to 'elp you - not to command you or punish you, as you seem to think, but to be on your side while you work out where you're going next.

And I'd untwist your knickers about the Admiral, if I were you. Those of us who come 'ere as volunteers, we get to see 'im once - that's it. No amount of dramatics and violence is going to change that.

Are you in danger of dryin' out badly enough to affect your 'ealth? And would you like a drink, while I'm 'ere?

[Bristling in silence as Iris speaks, Davy's face tentacles writhe angrily and curl up close to his chin - a sign of ever-impending stress and temper]

Keep your pity, woman. I need nothing from you.

There's a difference between compassion and pity, you calamari-faced oaf.

[To this, Davy only gives a mirthless smirk, his eyes narrowing]

You wait until I'm free of these bars, and then we'll see who calls who names.

Keep your compassion. What good has compassion ever done any man?

Spoken like a man who's never known any, clearly. It doesn't work that way, pet; like love and my bus, it goes where it wants.

[There are chairs down here for visitors and the supervising wardens; Iris pulls one up and settles in ot comfortably.]

So tell me about yourself, then, poppet. 'Ave you liked your life, so far?

And it can be just as soon chased away.

[Looking absolutely murderous as Iris begins making herself comfortable, Davy clacks his claw once]

Does it look to you as though I've had an enjoyable time of it?

[She grins, now.]

Spoken like a man that's never known me, clearly. Not the last two days, no, but before that, 'ow can I tell? I've always enjoyed pirating, meself.

Despite what you may assume, it is no longer within my duties to pirate, steal, and ransacks ships.

Well, that's why I asked, isn't it, lovey? I'm tryin' not to make assumptions.

Did you like your life, as it were before you come 'ere?

Stop asking after my life.

You 'ad enough to say earlier. I'm a curious sort of girl, lovey. I like finding things out.

[She tops up her glass from her everpresent hip flask, tilts it at him again and drinks, watching him thoughtfully.]

[Settling back against his bunk, Davy sets his heavy claw on his lap]

And to what use would you put your knowledge?

Well, I'm stuck on a boat with you whether we like it or not, lovey; it might come in 'andy. You're new and interesting and I'm down an inmate, though. I've got time on me 'ands. I don't really need another reason.

A fine zoo animal I make. A cursed man in a cage.

Off with you, woman.

Now you're just being petulant.

[Going nowhere.]

And I will continue to be so until you leave.

[Now she's enjoying herself; it's evident in the deeper smile and the wicked glint in her eyes.]

I'm nine 'undred years old, I don't need sleep and I brought a book, my love; is this the hill you really want to die on?

[And then, more softly.]

I will if you ask nicely.

I may have but a fraction of your years, but I have far more to lose. Leave me.

That's why I made the effort to make friends, lovey.

Nicely.

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